Re-reading my other blog post has made me realize that no matter what, Patrick is and was the b-kawk! to my sexy chicken. Although I wasn't happy with some aspects of our relationship, I still feel deeply for him and I think he feels the same way. Also, I should have communicated about the things that made me uncomfortable, instead of keeping them inside like I always do. Well hopefully in the future I'll be able to communicate better so that if Patrick and I do get the chance to be together again I can prevent these feelings of regret.

Ugh. I know I've said this a million times and that he's only been gone one day, but fuck nuts I miss him already. I should keep a list of all the clothes I cried into and wiped my nose on. So far I'm at two shirts and a washcloth. Well, at least I know he exists. He's surfing probably right now, reading books and eating eggs with sweet potatoes for breakfast. I actually feel a little better now, remembering the times we spent together.

Something sort of strange is that we couldn't sleep well together. We'd start out great, comfortable, then wake up two or three times, then back to sleep and wake up less than refreshed. What I like about it though is that sometimes I'd roll over on my side and he would spoon me back to sleep. As soon as he woke up, he'd get water and then make us breakfast.

That reminds me, I still owe him fish tacos! We made some and he said they sounded delicious, so I offered to make him some and completely forgot. If he still wants me to visit him, I'll make them for him then. With Salmon, because he loves it.

Blogging really helps me reflect, it's a shame that so often I forget to do it.