When I was with Darrin, amazing as he was, he made me feel badly when I was emotional. He'd say I'm too sensitive, too emotional, etc. And when I would cry, he hated it. He never ever wanted to see me cry and as sweet as that was, I felt like I was breaking his heart everytime I was emotional. Also, there were times when Darrin said some things I find offensive, and he'd say that I'm just easily offended.

Patrick, on the other hand seemed unphased by my tears. He held my hand and looked right at me with those beautiful eyes. He doesn't put my emotions over me, as if they control me. Holding my hand he guided me away from them, helped me try to be strong. He also doesn't say offensive things, so that whole issue is nonexistant. I'm not quite sure he's aware of the effect he has on me. Looking at him I see a person I care for deeply, as well as the sort of person I hope to one day become. 

I tried to explain to him once that I wish I had a female version of him to be my best friend, but after I told him that it seemed so ridiculous! What would I do with a Patricia? Paint her nails, talk about cute guys and girls, tell her everything, cry to her when I need to. I do that already with Patrick (except painting his nails). I feel like he can sense when I need to talk and when I'm holding back, as if he knows I need to get something out and he's always willing to listen. I'm happy I met Patrick, someone with so much happiness in his life that he has created and continues to create. 

I like meeting people and getting to know them because in doing so I learn more of myself. What I am, what I could be, what I want and wish not to be. I find it very helpful to figure for myself what I want in life by using others as an example.